Here’s something about “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” that you may have already guessed from the trailers: when you give Michael Bay $200 million dollars and tell him to go make a movie, Bay makes a movie that costs $200 million, and every cent of it can be seen on the big screen. As such, you really can’t fault “Fallen” for being what it is, and what it is is two and a half hours of things blowing up real good, giant CGI robots beating the living crap out of each other, and the occasional chuckle or two to carry you through the non-stuff blowing up/robot fighting moments. Most of that comes in the middle section, when the writers have to get that whole “plot” thing out of the way before commencing once again with the metal beatdown.
“Revenge of the Fallen” takes place a couple of years after the first movie, with Optimus Prime and his Autobots now working covertly (well, they’re supposed to be covert, anyway) with a multi-national force (but primarily with the Americans) to hunt and take down those pesky Decepticons. Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf), meanwhile, is preparing for a college career, while still maintaining a relationship with hot-to-trot squeeze Mikaela (Megan Fox). Alas, Sam’s normal life is put on hold when he touches a small piece of Allspark shrapnel (from the first movie) and begins to see strange alien hieroglyphics, an ability that causes a resurrected Megatron to seek him out. Speaking of those Decepticons, we learn that Transformers have been on Earth longer than we thought, and one in particular, dubbed The Fallen, is getting ready to make a comeback that may spell doom for Earth. You know, one of those scenarios.
There’s more to the film beyond the above, of course, though not by a whole lot more. The old bad guys are back, new bad guys are introduced, and more of the Transformers mythology is explored. Likewise for the Autobots. Along the way, familiar faces from the first movie make return appearances, including John Turturro, whose uptight G-man is now serving sandwiches in a mom and pop joint (though secretly keeping tabs on the ongoing war from his basement), and military guys Lennox (Josh Duhamel) and Epps (Tyrese Gibson) are part of the human-Autobot covert team. New faces include Aussie Isabel Lucas as a fellow classmate of Sam who has an unhealthy fixation with him, The Office’s Rainn Wilson in an amusing cameo as a lothario college professor, and Ramon Rodriguez as Sam’s college roommate, an entrepreneur who suspects that aliens are among us, and who screams like a girl.
But of course it’s all about the battling robots, and “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” has plenty of those, too. Lots of new robots (though curiously only the Decepticons seem to get creative with their robot designs) join the old ones to rain down destruction on one another, destroying pretty much everything in their path. Which leads to this observation: the film’s insistence that the human’s partnership with the Autobots is a secret from the world is ridiculous, especially when the Autobots, Decepticons, and human soldiers destroy about half of China in the film’s opening frame. How exactly do you credibly explain something like that away as an accident? Not that it matters , of course, because soon the Decepticons make themselves public (one wonders why they’ve been hiding all this time) and demand Sam Witwicky be turned over to them or else they’ll, well, keep doing what they’ve been doing. Which, now that I think about it, isn’t really all that much of a threat.
Obviously in a movie about giant robots from outer space it’s a given that there will be logic problems with the script. Not that you’ll notice, or be thinking about such mundane things. This isn’t that kind of movie. Screenwriters Ehren Kruger, Roberto Orci, and Alex Kurtzman have been given one mandate: string together enough of a “plot” to keep the robots fighting and the KA-BOOM! coming. The writers do just that, and “Fallen” features three major action set pieces, with probably the highlight being a forest fight between Optimus Prime and what seems like every Decepticon out there. The final action set piece goes on for, perhaps, just a tad too long, but it’s typical of a Michael Bay movie – the third act is always the loudest and most drawn-out, as if Bay is trying to beat you into mind-numbing submission with his neverending series of Earth-rattling explosions. He came pretty darn close, too, though whenever I started to check out, something insanely cool like the gigantic Devastator would pop up to make me pay attention again.
Fans of the original won’t be disappointed with “Revenge of the Fallen”. The CGI is still flawless, and the action is as high-octane as they come. Star Shia LaBeouf has become an old hand with acting against air, and he moves seamlessly through the CGI-heavy action scenes. Megan Fox does what Megan Fox does, which is try her best to act, but in general just looking hot. Well done, Megan. The rest of the human supporting cast have less to do, with Duhamel and Gibson basically running around with fancy guns firing at things offscreen. Highlights include John Turturro, reprising his Agent Simmons role, who brings a lot of manic energy to the movie when he’s finally re-introduced about halfway in. Also noteworthy are Julie White and Kevin Dunn, reprising their roles from the first movie as Sam’s parents.
Reviewing a movie like “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” is a snap. There’s really nothing about a movie like this that needs to be delved into too deeply. It is an action-packed sci-fi movie about robots from outer space that have come to Earth to beat the living Bejusus out of each other. And oh yeah, some human types get involve, too, I guess. As with the first movie, if the idea of giant effin’ robots slugging it out appeals to you, “Fallen” is your kind of movie, because it easily raises the stakes and doubles all the fun, explosions, and crazy fanboy energy of the first one. This isn’t a movie for people who will nitpick it to death, mostly because, well, the film doesn’t make a whole lot of sense from any angle, so why make the effort? So if narrative sense is what you’re after, steer clear of “Revenge of the Fallen”. But if you’re just looking for two and a half hours of solid sci-fi entertainment, you needn’t look any further this weekend.
Michael Bay (director) / Ehren Kruger, Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman (screenplay)
CAST: Megan Fox … Mikaela Banes
Shia LaBeouf … Sam Witwicky
Isabel Lucas … Alice
Hugo Weaving … Megatron (voice)
Josh Duhamel … Captain Lennox
John Turturro … Agent Simmons / Jetfire
Rainn Wilson … Professor Colan
Tyrese Gibson … USAF Tech Sergeant Epps
Ramon Rodriguez … Leo
